Vivre avec un angoissé Featured

28 Fév 2019
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Ne vous est-il jamais arrivé d’être inquiet pour une personne proche de vous qui vous confie être très angoissée, avoir parfois des idées de mort, ne plus savoir comment gérer ses angoisses… Et pourtant vous vous sentez vous-même démuni car vous ne savez pas tellement quoi faire. Être toujours présent?

Ce n’est pas possible au quotidien. Être toujours disponible au téléphone? Il peut arriver que je n’ai plus de batterie, que je sois occupé et que je ne puisse vraiment pas répondre… Bref, et pourtant qu’elle culpabilité je ressentirais s’il arrivait quelque chose!
Si je vous parle aujourd’hui de cela, en imaginant que cette personne soit votre conjoint, c’est parce que vous êtes le mieux placé pour pouvoir l’aider car c’est vous qui arrivez le mieux à discerner son état. Je tenais donc à vous donner trois outils pour que vous ne vous sentiez plus démuni devant cette situation et que vous fassiez tout ce qui est en votre pouvoir. Car il ne faut pas oublier que votre conjoint reste une personne libre qui peut user comme il l’entend de sa liberté et vous ne pourrez pas être toujours son sauveur. C’est normal et même souhaitable car ce n’est pas non plus votre rôle.
La première chose est donc d’évaluer ses confidences. Demandez-lui s’il a envie de mourir, s’il y a déjà pensé, s’il y pense actuellement. Il faut mettre des mots sur les choses, même si cela vous paraît brutal. S’il se confie à vous c’est qu’il sait que vous ne lui voulez que du bien donc saisissez cette confiance.
Si sa réponse est positive, alors dites-lui qu’il ne faut pas qu’il reste dans cet état, que vous vous ne pourrez pas l’aider car ce n’est pas votre rôle et que vous avez peur de ne pas être à la hauteur. S’il va vraiment très mal, n’hésitez pas à aller avec lui aux urgences psychiatriques.

Là vous aurez le conseil d’un médecin qui pourra faire quelque chose pour apaiser les angoisses. Sinon, prenez Rdv chez un spécialiste, un psychiatre et/ou psychologue qui pourra évaluer la démarche à suivre pour aider votre conjoint. Il ne faut pas attendre car je pars du principe qu’il vaut mieux prendre plus de précautions que pas assez. Je pense que c’est la meilleure preuve d’amour que vous puissiez faire à votre conjoint.

Enfin, essayez de passer un contrat avec lui, du type: « tu t’engages à ne pas passer à l’acte et à m’appeler dès que tu sens que rien de ne va plus. » C’est une façon de lui dire que vous êtes là, disponible, que vous comptez sur lui et que vous tenez à sa vie. C’est aussi un moyen pour lui de se sentir moins seul dans les moments de grande solitude et d’angoisse.

Encore une fois, n’attendez pas! On se laisse trop vite déborder. Vous ne pourrez jamais priver votre conjoint de sa liberté, mais vous pouvez faire en sorte de vous sentir quand même actif et diminuer ainsi toute votre culpabilité. Ne restez pas seul non plus, faites-vous entourer par des professionnels.

Camille Rochet

Last modified on jeudi, 28 février 2019 16:32
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